I think confinement is a good time for mums to rest, but without all the pantang larang. Would have love to have someone do all the work for me and just breastfeed the baby and sleep with them, but all the CLs that I talked to wasn’t supportive of breastfeeding, so I decided to go solo.

I didn’t follow any of the pantang larang, bcos my mum didn’t, and her mum didn’t either Seriously, I can’t find a good reason to, and not bathing is definitely something I can’t do. After having Leonard, it was heat wave season, and after bathing with warm water, it was still so warm that I bathed with cold water after that. Took too much chocolate after having #3 and had bad constipation

My mum helped me with Leonard for 1 week, and after that I went home bcos her house is sooooo hot, and I couldn’t take it anymore.
So with all 3, I basically stayed home with the baby myself, and sometimes DH will bring food back, sometimes I cook myself. Do other things also like laundry, watch tv, surf the net, bathe the baby, ironing clothes and go shopping. Have to climb staircase also cos I live on the 4th floor with no lift, and carry the baby myself.

So far so good, no aches in my body that did not come from something I overdid or strained myself.

I think taking the heaty stuff that makes us sweat is for the body to produce more milk, since the breast glands are modified sweat glands. I did take some Chinese tea during a dinner during the confinement month, and I could see it reduce my breast milk. Took nasi briyani and boomed the supply shot up again. Must be all the herbs in the rice.

My MIL followed all the pantang larang diligently for all her 13 kids, but still got arthritis and all sorts of aches in her legs and hands. So IMHO, we can rest all we want, but if we still have to wash clothes, mop the floor, cook and iron and do everything else for the next 40-50 years of our lives after and while having the kids, we’re bound to ache.
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Mom to Leonard (17/05/00), Lucas (28/11/01) and Laurenz (21/06/03).

I heard from someone before, the reasons why women in confinement were asked not to shower, and to wear few layers of clothes, etc. and it was exactly the same as what Min has explaining, i.e. they were practiced in China in the old times, and probably passed down to our grandmas, and mas, and now, us.

Anyway, Min, I did the same exact thing with my second child. I didn’t hire a CL because the first one stressed me out! Was not a supporter of BF either, curi curi give my elder daughter formula! This time, I just taught my maid how to cook the chicken with the wine. Black Chicken with herbs. And to boil red date water everyday. Veges, I still consume as per normal, and papayas everyday to avoid constipation and to boost milk supply. And two weeks postnatal, after feeding the baby, I went to 1 Utama with my elder child and have a nice 2 hours there, sipping hot chocolate and window shopping.
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Moommy to two little ladies (3yrs & 13mths).

A lot of the confinement practice (I’m talking about Chinese confinement practice lah) is probably brought from China where it is cold and during times when there was no running water and water heater. Also, the 30 days after childbirth was the only time a woman gets to be pampered and given nutritious food. Dulu dulu, the men get all the good food and the women get leftovers ma. That practice wasn’t so long ago, especially with the “pendatang baru” (new immigrants from China) in the 1920′s. In modern times, I believe the confinement practice is to get new moms to rest and not be gallivanting about town ‘coz they’re feeling lighter and has a sudden burst of energy!

I like the idea of getting help in the first month. However, we live in the tropics and there is running hot water, so why cannot shower? Cannot eat vege. for a month! Get constipated? I think that’s even more unhealthy than being afraid of getting “wind”! I believe in moderation and working with the baby’s rhythm. Shower and wash hair with warm water, eat lots of veg and drink lots of water and everything else. I liked drinking the date drink ‘coz I thought it helped with my milk supply.

I had a confinement lady after I delivered Laura. Very quickly I made her understand that I was the boss and laid out what I expected and the way I wanted things done. I was to breastfeed my daughter (as it turned out it was EBM in the first month) and that she would be with me 24-7. However, when Laura pooped, I handed to her lor I wore T-shirt and sarong around the house and wore slippers. I was living in a double-storey house then, so showered every day and washed my hair too. My confinement lady boiled some herbal stuff for me to bathe every few days. As if she didn’t know I showered lah. She didn’t dare say anything. DH was in a theatre production soon after I delivered, so when Laura was jaundiced and had to see a doc when 4 days old, I drove my confinement lady to the hospital. I stayed with Laura in the hospital so I can express for her. The CL couldn’t bring food to me, so I had to eat hospital food isn’t it? Survive ok lah….

When with Adam, I decided not to hire a CL ‘coz I got fed up with CLs when the first one got drunk at Laura’s full moon party. I got the chinese sinseh to put together some stuff to balance out the Yin and Yang in my body and taught me maid what to do. Instructed my maid to cook with rice wine, ginger and sesame oil. Taught her to boil the dates drink every day for a month. Cooked veg as per normal and to double boil herbs for me once a week 2 weeks after delivery. Made a conscience effort to rest when the baby rest but was out of the house before 30th day. Coincidentally, DH was again involved in a theatre production soon after Adam was born, so I did the marketing with my maid.

Min